Top Tier Cinema: the Nostalgia Edition

The Disney Channel makes fantastic movies for people of all ages.


The Disney Channel makes fantastic movies for people of all ages.

Alexander Yagoda, Staff Writer

From the beginning of this millennium and in the following decade, a golden age of film emerged from a variety of unlikely sources, one of them being The Disney Channel. Now, long after all of these movies have come out, we can compare them and review them, as well as spin-offs and related titles.

Spy Kids 

Our Rating: B+

The “classic” movie from after the millenium, “Spy Kids” boasts action, comedy, and even mystery, all in a neat, family-friendly package. This film ushered in a new era of movies made to cater both to the childish desires of children, and to the more subtle and mature sense of humor so adults can actually enjoy watching a movie they didn’t really want to watch with their children. The childish themes include the cast being mainly children and the simple plot and dialogue; the aspect that appeals most to adults would be the fact that the movie is about super spies, which is by far the best occupation that would make the average adult at least a little bit envious.

The world’s smallest spies prove big things can come in small packages.

Spy Kids 2

Our Rating: A++

Moving on to the sequel of the original “Spy Kids,” “Spy Kids 2” is by far the most complex film in the series. Throughout the movie, Steve Buscemi constantly shares valuable words of wisdom at random intervals, like his most famous quote: “Do you think God stays in heaven because he too lives in fear of what he’s created here on earth?” In addition, Danny Trejo plays the spy kid’s large and intimidating uncle, who is affectionately named “Machete,” more than eight years before the movie “Machete” was released where Danny Trejo stars as a character also named Machete.

“The whole Steve Buscemi scene was really great. For a while I thought the quote was made up by some Facebook page for quotes, but then I found out it was from ‘Spy Kids 2,’ and that really made my respect for the Spy Kids franchise grow,” sophomore Brian Mena said.

The world’s most famous bite-sized spies are back at it again.

Spy Kids 3-D

Our Rating: A+++

“Spy Kids 3” is probably the best movie created prior to the rise of Pixar as the dominant production studio for children’s movies. Starring George Clooney as the President, and Sylvester Stallone as George Clooney, “Spy Kids 3” was the first Spy Kids film to be shown in theaters, and is an absolute blast to watch. It has a deep and compelling plot, and a subtle humor that is placed throughout the film in a manner the leaves the audience wondering why it didn’t receive any Oscars.

The saviors of the universe who don’t even have a learners permit now get to fight Sylvester Stallone and his multiple personalities.

Sharkboy and Lavagirl

Our Rating: A

“Sharkboy and Lavagirl” is the story of how a pre-Twilight Taylor Lautner, playing Sharkboy, and his friend Lavagirl make a useless boy feel less useless in a world where the useless boy is the only being that doesn’t have some kind of special power. The useless boy, however, is  rather useless in reference to the plot as well. The movie’s humor and scenes of intense action make up for this in a spectacular fashion.

The core essence of everyone’s childhood.

High School Musical

Our Rating: A+

Nothing can be said about this movie that hasn’t already been said. Originally airing on the Disney Channel in 1807, “High School Musical” served as an inspiration for the modern musical, and is rumored to have been the inspiration for renowned Broadway shows such as “Wicked” and “Cats.” Starring Zac Efron as the only persona one could imagine young Zac Efron playing (a cool kid perpetually in the middle years of high school, not too smart but a good kid), “High School Musical” is set in a high school in Albuquerque, and tells the story of young basketball star Troy Bolton and how his love interest Gabriella Montez’s attempts at seducing Troy were repeatedly foiled by Sharpay Evans, the only person in the world whose name sounds more like a small terrier’s name than her small terrier, “Boi.” This doggish name contributes to Sharpay’s doggish behavior which only becomes worse throughout the movie, especially in the sequels. The movie is an all around contemporary classic, with music, drama and romance to spare.

“‘High Shool Musical’ has only been out for 12 years, but it’s already a classic. Everyone knows the lyrics to the songs, and everyone likes Zac Efron,” sophomore Ivan Cajina said.

The foundation of all good modern musical talent originated with this movie.

Phineas and Ferb The Movie: Across the 2nd Dimension

Our Rating: A+

The plot is simple: while celebrating Perry’s adoption anniversary, everyone ends up at Doofenshmirtz’s lab, and a portal to a mirror dimension where Doofenshmirtz rules the Tri-State Area due to his resolve being hardened at a young age due to his loss of his favorite choo choo toy is accidentally opened. A secret organization comprised of the alternate universe’s versions of Phineas, Ferb, Candace and the Fireside Girls infiltrates Doofenshmirtz 2’s base and corner him, only to be captured my Normbots. However, they are then released when Doofenshmirtz 2 turns into a small man-boy upon being given Doofenshmirtz 1’s symbolic choo choo toy. The people from the first dimension then have to go counterclockwise across multiple dimensions to get home, and Candace doesn’t even try to get the boys busted. Overall, “Phineas and Ferb The Movie: Across the 2nd Dimension” is a fantastic movie, containing compelling dialogue like “My choo choo,” and incredible displays of humor. Boasting a 7.5 on IMDb, this movie is sure to blow away all those who watch it.

The best animated show on television is now the best animated movie on television.

In conclusion, children’s movies that were not released in theaters are normally not considered award winning movies, but this is not to say that those movies shouldn’t win awards. They are entertaining, endearing, and most of all, fun for the whole family.